To some people, the idea of a shot gun wedding is a new phenomenon. The idea that you can get married against your will (because you have been caught in a compromising situation) is totally foreign- foreign but not unheard of and before you start thinking that these things must happen in autocratic states, they could even happen in Uganda today. The extent to which the “gun” is pulled out will vary but at the end of the day, it is a means by which a couple is forced to marry.
The idea of the shot gun wedding evolved in response to changes in society’s acceptance of what was morally acceptable and the importance placed on the sanctity of marriage. It is the propagation of older generations that marriage is the structure into which couples enter and everything related to the marriage bed should be consigned to it and not out of it and generally, young people straying from this edict should be brought back to the straight and narrow.
Today more than ever people are not taking the institution of marriage that seriously for a number of reasons key among them being that sexual relations, the key reason to get married, are no longer being restricted to the marriage bed. Society has become so lax about the whole “no sex before marriage campaign” that you are ridiculed because you are sexually inexperienced.
The pressure being applied from social groups and media content to appear “sexy and confident” are often translated into being sexually experienced and not limiting yourself to just one partner. It often comes across as a competition between males and females to best each other at sexual prowess which is at odds with what we are taught about being appreciating the beauty of sex and the point of engaging in it within marriage.
Many of you would scoff at the idea of “being sold into marriage for free” but this could be the answer to some of the problems we are facing today. You would think that the fact that we have issues like HIV/AIDS and other STDS would deter people in their discovery of sexual fulfillment but most people I have talked to would rather get AIDS than become pregnant. The logic behind this is you can hide your HIV status but not that telling bump.
By the time it is becoming common place for your parents (should they be bothered to) not to ask your suitor what his intentions are because your suitor changes much faster than the tide does, then its time to step back and ask yourself if marriage as an institution will actually live past the present generation or if men (and women) will take responsibility for the lives that they bring into this world.
It might be argued that because of the way you are forced into marriage, bitterness may grow and your husband might abuse you because he was cornered into taking you on- not neccessarily physically of course.
I think that for all the brutality and finality of the short gun wedding, this might be a way to right some wrongs. If your father and brothers stood up for you, your husband would not even think of taking on young innocent girls, the practice of "sugar daddy's" would be some what curtailed which would in turn reduce on the spread of HIV/AIDS and STDs.
The idea of the shot gun wedding evolved in response to changes in society’s acceptance of what was morally acceptable and the importance placed on the sanctity of marriage. It is the propagation of older generations that marriage is the structure into which couples enter and everything related to the marriage bed should be consigned to it and not out of it and generally, young people straying from this edict should be brought back to the straight and narrow.
Today more than ever people are not taking the institution of marriage that seriously for a number of reasons key among them being that sexual relations, the key reason to get married, are no longer being restricted to the marriage bed. Society has become so lax about the whole “no sex before marriage campaign” that you are ridiculed because you are sexually inexperienced.
The pressure being applied from social groups and media content to appear “sexy and confident” are often translated into being sexually experienced and not limiting yourself to just one partner. It often comes across as a competition between males and females to best each other at sexual prowess which is at odds with what we are taught about being appreciating the beauty of sex and the point of engaging in it within marriage.
Many of you would scoff at the idea of “being sold into marriage for free” but this could be the answer to some of the problems we are facing today. You would think that the fact that we have issues like HIV/AIDS and other STDS would deter people in their discovery of sexual fulfillment but most people I have talked to would rather get AIDS than become pregnant. The logic behind this is you can hide your HIV status but not that telling bump.
By the time it is becoming common place for your parents (should they be bothered to) not to ask your suitor what his intentions are because your suitor changes much faster than the tide does, then its time to step back and ask yourself if marriage as an institution will actually live past the present generation or if men (and women) will take responsibility for the lives that they bring into this world.
It might be argued that because of the way you are forced into marriage, bitterness may grow and your husband might abuse you because he was cornered into taking you on- not neccessarily physically of course.
I think that for all the brutality and finality of the short gun wedding, this might be a way to right some wrongs. If your father and brothers stood up for you, your husband would not even think of taking on young innocent girls, the practice of "sugar daddy's" would be some what curtailed which would in turn reduce on the spread of HIV/AIDS and STDs.
Hmm, that bunch of flowers in your profile picture, are they in a blender? Please hit the start button so that we may observe what happens?
Oh...the post...
((falls off chair laughing))
you sound so serious about this... and it is something serious.
but it in a weird sort of way it would be a good idea to help with the abstinance, most guys would be taking off for the hills!
I tell you sybella they would not run
@31337: You're smoking some potent shit, there.
This post is different from the usual Tandrama. :o)
It's nice.
And, Tandra, your pace of changing themes makes me dizzy, sometimes I don't even know if it is a new one I'm seeing ... But this looks like it's surviving. And it's cute.
Hit the START button, please.
@31337 hadn't noticed the blender before lol.
Its quite liberating this practice called abstinence. I recommend it.
@31337: Looks like Tandra will not be joining us for that swing party afterall.... she done gone n gotten all prude on us:(
I saw shot gun wedding and the first thought in my head was who got shot. Then i find a deep a*** post instead. It does not make sense to me to get married to someone just because i got her pregnant, it shall be a loveless marriage and its the poor kid caught in the middle that shall bear the brunt of it. But if you engage in pre-marital sex you should be willing and able to take the consequences be it a venereal disease or a child, condoms, pills and what not does not always work at 100% efficiency, there shall be some ooops moments!
TANDRAMA.... Rev, come pick yo royalties1
@BS
You are so spot on!!
@Sy
That abstinence thing isn't as bad as you think..
@27th-C
Yeah,
The post is different from the randomsiez innit!
and it is nice too...
Tandra-ma is nice!!
@TheIntelligensiaNetwork
Hilarious at notice-ing the blender cum flower vase!!
Hilarious!!
@Miss_Tandra-licious!
OK!
[My_Take]
You do have some strong sentiments on the no sex before marriage...
and also the fact that guys should be more respnsible...
but for a country that has grappled with the AIDS epidemic, for longer than most, we should as people be aware that as we over-indulge in sexual excesses, we should be aware of the repercussions..
Shot-Gun weddings are crap!!
i know someone who did the whole okuhingira, church wedding, honeymoon, and flushed after!!
now, all he does is send a dime every two weeks to his baby-mama!!
CRAP!!
i wrote somewhere (@ the B2B-blog) that we do not need to wait for something to happen to be changed by something!
Your post cleverly highlights that Miss Tandra-licious
Now, are we all gearing up for Tumwi's Bu-Commando(es) at the next Ug-BHH??
I bet you even Dante will be there earlier than usual!!
@ mr.b2b, i do know that abstinence is not hard... but for guys, tis as if a punishment. i dated guys who i would tell from the begining that i wouldn't sleep with them and they are like, ofcourse we understand and then less than a month later, they start that drama of, you are killing me... like not having sex would kill them. total crap! would flush them so fast... i love you tandra ((grinning))
@Sy
I guess the whole abstinence thing comes from who is starting it...
For it to appear like a punishment, it then shows on who doesn't want to be with the other, and for what reason...
if it is a punishment, then it will feel like that...
if it is for a good cause, then.... it will also feel like that...
@Tandra
i sense a certain serious-ness on you that you don't usually show...
or worse still that i haven't seen...
Deep!
Young People from this edict should be brought back to the straight and narrow indeed!
Tandra you can try this link http://www.bloggingmix.com/2007/10/14/free-blogger-templates/
http://www.bloggingmix.com/2007/10/14/free-blogger-templates/
so, who potted black?
Abstinence oyeeee! Abstinence oyeee! Come on, take up the chant people. You too Tandra. LOL.
New theme. :o)
While I'm waiting for some more Tandrama ...
Post already.
Kati- me i want to meet those people who would rather have aids than be pregnant!!! T- stay away from those- I see serious warpedness