Months ago, everything in your life was stable, good friends, good music, good food and all that. Then cherise went n done a stupid thing, she encroached on "private property" and we aint talking land here.
Well technically they not private property but we are talking about becoming friends with that dense best boy mate of yours.Suddenly you are getting updates from her and being asked where He is so THEY can hang. Both of them are too wrapped in the magic of the experience to realize that they are hurting you and are too caught up to realise that they would not even be together if it wasnt for you.
You do not know who of the two to blame or beat up more. Dense Darren for not knowing or Stupid Cherise for knowing what it feels like and being herselfish self and going out of her way to become her engaging self.
You rationalise that Darren is naturally dense, he's a guy...wat does he know anyway,right?
Now Cherise on the otherhand... knows guyz are dense and uses it to her advantage so technically, she's the problem.
But u know what they say...if ur peep is going to stray, there aint nuthing u gonna do about it.
So you take the high road..laugh when u need to.. smile when u need to... offer assurance when needed...explain him to her to make it easier for her to understand him.... listen to her for hours tell you about how brilliant he is and what he is up to and all that time, you are thinking to yourself...
yeah, i used to know this. I USED to b the one he talked to. I used to KNOW what was going to happen before it did... yeah i USED to be the ONE
There are a few disturbing things said as the days became weeks,fortnights, weeks...months.
She still thinks Darren thinks you are the cheese and Darren still tries to involve u in his life (albeit half heartedly according to you). it always comes across like you are the spare peep.
When his SMS's dwindle, you remember her one day jokingly swearing to come between you and you think "guess the jokes on me".
He calls you up, you are excited until u learn that he called Cherise first and because she didnt pick up n he needed a filler, he called you.
But on days when you are feeling secure about who you are, you sometimes think maybe this is just a phase, Darren will come back to me...he knows where home is....
This goes on for a while until one day you wake up and realise that you dont need anyone to reafirm who you are, to approve of you... to be your "yes man".
You had gotten so caught up in seeing yourself through other peoples eyes and forgotten to take a lot and see the person you know you are....You were before them and you will be after them.
As the days become weeks and months, you are no longer hurt when Darren doesnt take the time to find out how you are because quite frankly, your life did not stop because he didnt ask.
You dont mind cherise telling you about him but because you have stopped being the "key-to-darren-guide" it amuses you no end when she fumbles around.If she wants to be with him, she needs to learn, no short cuts.
You stop looking for clues in everything he says and then u realise, you have finally grown up. Sure you still believe in dreams and love and all that rot... it doesnt mean you will ever forget who YOU are.
The most important lesson you learned and remembered is you are an important independent valuable person in your own right.
Well technically they not private property but we are talking about becoming friends with that dense best boy mate of yours.Suddenly you are getting updates from her and being asked where He is so THEY can hang. Both of them are too wrapped in the magic of the experience to realize that they are hurting you and are too caught up to realise that they would not even be together if it wasnt for you.
You do not know who of the two to blame or beat up more. Dense Darren for not knowing or Stupid Cherise for knowing what it feels like and being herselfish self and going out of her way to become her engaging self.
You rationalise that Darren is naturally dense, he's a guy...wat does he know anyway,right?
Now Cherise on the otherhand... knows guyz are dense and uses it to her advantage so technically, she's the problem.
But u know what they say...if ur peep is going to stray, there aint nuthing u gonna do about it.
So you take the high road..laugh when u need to.. smile when u need to... offer assurance when needed...explain him to her to make it easier for her to understand him.... listen to her for hours tell you about how brilliant he is and what he is up to and all that time, you are thinking to yourself...
yeah, i used to know this. I USED to b the one he talked to. I used to KNOW what was going to happen before it did... yeah i USED to be the ONE
There are a few disturbing things said as the days became weeks,fortnights, weeks...months.
She still thinks Darren thinks you are the cheese and Darren still tries to involve u in his life (albeit half heartedly according to you). it always comes across like you are the spare peep.
When his SMS's dwindle, you remember her one day jokingly swearing to come between you and you think "guess the jokes on me".
He calls you up, you are excited until u learn that he called Cherise first and because she didnt pick up n he needed a filler, he called you.
But on days when you are feeling secure about who you are, you sometimes think maybe this is just a phase, Darren will come back to me...he knows where home is....
This goes on for a while until one day you wake up and realise that you dont need anyone to reafirm who you are, to approve of you... to be your "yes man".
You had gotten so caught up in seeing yourself through other peoples eyes and forgotten to take a lot and see the person you know you are....You were before them and you will be after them.
As the days become weeks and months, you are no longer hurt when Darren doesnt take the time to find out how you are because quite frankly, your life did not stop because he didnt ask.
You dont mind cherise telling you about him but because you have stopped being the "key-to-darren-guide" it amuses you no end when she fumbles around.If she wants to be with him, she needs to learn, no short cuts.
You stop looking for clues in everything he says and then u realise, you have finally grown up. Sure you still believe in dreams and love and all that rot... it doesnt mean you will ever forget who YOU are.
The most important lesson you learned and remembered is you are an important independent valuable person in your own right.
My words here. Before i am done reading the other one you get inspired and drop another one?
ok Tandra...
Does my take have any bearing...
Will er... see!
one word..BIRANGO!!
very true!
OMG...this happened to me..I'm so happy I'm over the guy now..it used to hurt me so much...thinking about it now I wonder why...
Thanks for this...absolutely love this post
Damn! Sorry about that. Peeps can be inconsiderate. I am glad you are as you say "grown up" and have gotten over Darren. Chinny chin up. Wipe that tear, choke it up to experience.
You are making me think dear. Someone may have mentioned growing up but surely you should take us to that point slowly. Now me 'ead 'urts!! Anyone got some aspirin?
dreams, love and all that rot?! eh, kika... can tell the pissed mood you were in when 'writing' this!
but the important thing is that you overcame. good for you.
Darren? Cherise?
Do real people have these sort of names?
Tandra, just say no to the soap operas. Just Say No.
but 3..we need to talk!
b2b u b there seeing.....
joshi...lol
the emrys Amen!
neema.... yes!!!
val...thanks
3..come i give u a hug! wil work better than asprin...guaranteed!
syb wasnt actually in a mood...interestingly enough.... yeah!! we go party!!!
tumwi... u dont know peeps like? im like in shock! u of all people i wld expect to know such peoplez!
and no...no soaps for me LOL
Tandra...u can have fun changing templates..
I hope yo boss knows how productive u are. Mpozi,are u still yo own boss?
Cheri
Oh how I relate to this story! Tsk tsk tsk.
gal i was here in a rush so;no comment will have to do
I know what you mean.
Thank you for passing by at mine. The answer is yes to your question.
can't say much...AMEN!